My Bugs

Do you ever wonder where time goes? I look at my children and fear time is going too quickly. Such wonderful babies they all were. I have the best memories ever with each of my children. I know there are many many more memories that will come too. It is so much fun to watch them grow and change, and to start new times in their lives. Yet, so difficult too. Never will I know the feeling of a little baby with a furry head of hair in my arms. I look at Luci sometimes and wonder if this will be the last night she ever crawls in bed with me again. I hope not. I wonder if it will be the last time I put her sock on for her or wash her hair for her. She really doesn't need my help anymore. I know that. But I'm not ready to be done. Juliannah just went to her first homecoming. This is a new era in our lives. A new chapter. I loved it. It was so much fun dress shopping for her and I feel blessed that I will get to do this with her several more times not to mention with Cassidy and Luci. I will be so proud the day my boys are in suites slipping a corsage on their dates wrist. My boys are so handsome. Any girl on the receiving end of that flower should be honored, although, I am biast. :)
It's difficult at the same time though. My little Annah is all grown up. Not completely but enough that it makes me step back and look at her. How have I done so far? I see a beautiful young lady. Smart and talented. The whole world at her finger tips. She is amazing. Did I do this? Did I create this person or is she just a random production of society? I would like to take credit for who she is and has become. Especially after having her so young and dealing with so much criticism from people who apparently don't have time to look in the mirror. All I know is, if Nick wants me to read him a story I'm going to. If Cassidy wants to paint my nails rainbow colors, she can. It's becoming clear that these days aren't going to last much longer. Even getting rid of the toys they don't play with is becoming more difficult. Toys are starting to become extinct here. Slowly, but they are, and a few years from now there will be make-up in my bathroom instead of Barbies. Shower gel and razors in my shower instead of bubble bath and bra's in the laundry instead of sponge bob and days of the week undies. I'm not ready for this.